Therapy Tips for Setting Boundaries During the Holidays

Raise your hand if you’re tired of awkward holiday dinners, dodging political rants, invasive personal questions, or unsolicited advice about your life.

During the holidays, loved ones often feel a little too entitled to cross personal boundaries, and it can leave you feeling anxious, tense, or emotionally drained before dessert is even served.

But here’s the good news: you don’t owe anyone answers that cost you your peace.Boundaries are a form of care—and that includes caring for yourself.

2 Therapist-Backed Ways to Hold Your Boundaries

Here’s what our Honest Hour therapists—Jasmine and Carla—recommend for navigating awkward holiday moments without drama or guilt.

Tip #1: Be Direct and Walk Away

Jasmine Ramirez, a Latina therapist, smiling warmly in a cozy office setting, wearing a white blouse

Jasmine Ramirez, LCSW, CFSW

In her Latinx family, Jasmine often encounters pushy behavior. Her go-to approach is to be direct and then remove herself from the situation if needed. If she feels uncomfortable or uninterested in a topic, she says something like:

“I don’t really want to engage in that topic.”

Then, she simply walks away. This method helps establish her comfort levels while avoiding further escalation.

Tip #2: Deflect or Change the Subject

smiling softly in front of a neutral background

Carla O'Neil, LMSW

Carla recommends calmly stating your discomfort or redirecting the conversation. For instance, if asked an invasive question, she might say:

“I’ve been focusing on work and haven’t thought much about dating.”

When politics come up, Carla often changes the subject or excuses herself to grab a snack. Steering clear of divisive topics helps her maintain peace during the holidays.

Why Boundaries Matter During the Holidays

Holidays can bring up old patterns, emotional pressure, and people who test your limits. But you don’t have to keep saying yes just to keep the peace.

You’re allowed to protect your energy. You’re allowed to set boundaries around what you share—and what you don’t. You’re allowed to prioritize your mental health.

Want to Feel More Grounded This Holiday Season?

Whether you’re setting boundaries for the first time or breaking old patterns that no longer serve you, therapy can help you feel more grounded, supported, and real.

At Honest Hour, we offer virtual therapy for clients in New York and New Jersey—and we’re in-network with UMR, Aetna, and UnitedHealthcare. We also welcome out-of-network clients.

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